It's easy for me to get lost. I can't really claim to ever have had much of a sense of direction. I'm easily turned around in my own hometown sometimes, much less when I'm traveling. In 1997 Terri and I were working at a camp in Livingston, Texas. It was July. We had just met in May. She was "in a serious relationship." I was seriously taken with her. That weekend in July she told me she had ended the "serious relationship." I couldn't stop thinking about things on my way to pick up some folks at the Houston airport. Would she go on a date with me? Where should I take her? When should I propose. You know, normal stuff! The next thing I knew I was just outside of Galveston. On our honeymoon Terri was asleep in the rental car as I drove us back from Asheville, North Carolina to Charlotte, North Carolina to catch our return flight. Thinking about our new life, I knew something was amiss when I saw the Welcome to South Carolina sign as we passed it. So there's a pattern there I suppose, and really, I shouldn't blame it on her. I just tend to get lost, especially when distracted. Not much has changed in that regard.
A few friends have asked what's going on lately. We haven't conversed as much, I haven't written much here. I've been distant, isolated. It's an easy place for me to be. Totally wrapped up in the here and now of life to be lost to the stuff of life. But then I see the sign. The one that says Galveston, Texas or Welcome to South Carolina. The one that reminds me I'm not at all where I thought I was. This post from Tom Davis' blog was that sign for me today. 100 people newly infected with HIV/AIDS in Russia every day. That's 900 between the time Tom wrote his post and the time I read it. 900 lives changed forever. And that's just Russia. As I left work tonight there was a sharp chill in the air from a cold front that had moved in while I worked inside. Driving home I wondered about the couple of guys who sleep in a makeshift tent just inside the tree line off of the downtown spur. And I remembered where I live. A world where things are not right. A place where not everyone has a home, where disease and hunger and dirty water rob so many of basic necessities. And I wondered at where my mind had been. At where I had devoted so much of my mental focus and attention. And I repented. I repented of house lust, of spending too much time daydreaming of our next vacation, and giving every waking thought (seemingly) to work. And it felt good. And right. And maybe the direction will stay clear for a little while.
Glad you are back. The blogging world is a better place when you are commenting on life. Now to get Terri back up and running...
Posted by: Sydney | Saturday, February 23, 2008 at 09:51 PM